A Feel

im planning not to write more about my deepshit in here but channeling it to talk directly to Almighty that hear me most of the time. the feeling of it only Allah knows best while all the writing in here is just some sort like a manuscript of my feeling tonite that written by me.

just like poem, we wrote the word according to what our brain tells us. but the feeling of it is different depends on how good the imagination of the reader and the similarity that the reader feels about it. But the true message in it is something that remain the same. words and feeling is something that totaly different. a word did not describe a feeling. but ya, end up we know what we want to say about it when we really going trough the words in the sentences carefully. this what we called art in writing.

again, i dont think im able to not write things in here ever again because, like what i said. im as a writer didnt feel that im telling the whole feeling enough to make someone read it knows exactly what i want to confess in here, only by talking to Allah i feel relieved even without a words neither sentences. but if ever i think this writing is something that can be benefits to others, again, i dont think i can not  write in here anymore.

a feeling of the similarity is actually we are looking for, feeling of acceptation, love, betrayal, sadness, happiness, drama in life, all the pain, the gain, we all have that. all of it is given to us. apart of being a human, we must used this given gift that Allah has provided us to take in charge in our role in life. we must because from there, we learn. we teach our self to improve and be better. i want to be better than my past self. what about you?

so im gonna pray now, telling god all my feeling. even i know currently, while not telling the whole thing about what my feeling is, Allah knows what im feeling now. more than i know myself.

Subhanallah. allah hu akhbar.

40% awake, 60%merepek